Friday, June 3, 2011

Soup Operas


Scene 1: Davis and Janet are a middle aged couple living in some run down block of flats in London.
Davis walks in the door from going shopping. Janets on the couch half sitting half lying down watching east enders.
Janet: Hey Davis what took ya so long? You been out for half the friggin day! You got the six pack I asked for?
Davis: No I didn´t have time to get ya stupid beer I was out with me mates wasn´t I.
Janet: But ya did go shopping didn´t ya, ya big doofis?
Davis: Course love, what do you think I is... stupid?
Janet: So you got me crisps then haven´t ya, cause I told ya i wanted crisps?
Davis: Sorry luv didn´t get ya your crisps either that stuffs like a luxury these days can´t be just throwing out money these days.
Janet: So where´s the coca cola?
Davis: You never mentioned no coca cola, wasn´t even on the list was it?
Janet: But ya always get coca cola when ya go shopping dave?
Davis: No dear and guess what? Yesterday was watchen the tele and they was saying that coke´s bad for your stomach, so i was clever today wasn´t I? Saved ourselves a big stomach ache.
Janet: So what we going to drink then?
Davis: Still got half a bottle of milk in the fridge don´t we?
Janet: I guess so, so what exactly did you get while you were shopping?
Davis: I just bet all the shopping money on the dogs, cause i had a real good feeling, plus my mates picked up some inside tips! Lost though wasn´t it, maybe get me luck back next week.

-:As Davis finished his sentence janet threw the remote at Davis´ head hitting him in the temple and knocking him down where he landed in an awkward sitting position rubbing his head and mumbling.
Two hours late when Davis came around he found janet had already gone to bed even though it was early and she usually went to bed late. Davis was outside the bedroom door apologizing.-:
Davis: Just forgive me luv wont happen again me and the lads just havin some laughs down at the bookies is all.
-: Then Janet starts to cry in big moans and groans which really start annoying Davis.
Davis: Come on luv sorry, i´m sorry just stop it!
-:Then Janet turns out the light and thinks to herself with a tear in her eye:Things could have been different. Leaving Davis to sleep on the sofa with his head swollen on the side. Davis puts his head down and thinks to himself with a tear in his eye:Things could have been different.

End of first scene.
Soup operas are the new craze in Britain!
This is a soup opera filmed the same way as a soap opera. Soap operas usually contain ultra-beautiful actors and actresses who play wealthy unfaithful characters from rich neighbourhoods. Soup operas contain poor and annoying characters who are sometimes faithful from poor neighbourhoods.
Soup operas are a new wave hitting Britian showing the poor working class literally worts and all!
Some of the scenes give you an idea of the kind of lifestyles they live. And the problems they create in their own lives can be as hilarious as they are precarious.
Flat apartments where drug users and stray dogs wander round. With dozens of takeaway outlets with unknown franchise names like "Huge burger" and "Chicken time." And on every corner a small but well signposted alcohol store.
A good sized children´s playground with a sandpit minus the sand and just a layer of hard mud.(when it´s dry)
Broken chain swings. And a caved in slide soiled from top to bottom with doggy do do.
Only the latch key kid children go there to organize trouble. And even though the playground is well fenced off, there are several holes in the fences where delinquents and drug users enter and exit at leisure.
The front carpark of the block of flats is half filled with broken down cars minivans and car parts. The other half of the carpark is empty because the residents use public transport. The front carpark is also full of rubbish that the collectors deemed to toxic or sickly to clear away.
The soup opera is more interesting, for one because there is real domestic violence. Even conflict between local gangs that have claimed the block of flats as their own. In general much more entertainment than the tame squabbles of middleclass lovers who have no notion of losing it.
Also there´s the true sense of family which brings people together like for example, when a family member comes back to the flats after doing time in prison. The whole community often reunites on such occasions for a barbeque or if it´s winter simply a good old piss up drinking session which potentially lands somebody else in prison. So get into the new soup opera style where lower class citizens, second hand shoes, ex cons and welfare checks are as hot as desperate housewives!

Segredos do Faustão



Faustão: O grande anfitriao do show de domingo.
A voz dele é forte e como ele se organiza o show dele é muito bom.
Ele sabe conduzir a audiência, e como os grandes olhos dele agrada!
Mas uma coisa fica estranho: Ele emagraceu!!! Agora ele esta mais magro.
Ele fez uma cirurgia do estômago.
Faustão não anda mais como pato e o corpo dele esta melhor.
Espera um momentinho! Que foi esses boatos que Faustão estava com uma aberraçao no corpo dele?
Alguns ex amigos dele juram que ele tem um terceiro mamilo. E que estava là desde que ele nasceu ou foi colocado como uma marca spiritual.
Boatos sairam antes que ele fez cirurgia no estômago.
Ex amigos do Faustão affirmam que ele não tirou a coisa estranha durante a cirurgia.
Medicos que estavam presentes durante cirurgia não quiseram comentar.
Tambem nenhum membro da familia dele comentou.
Abalados fás de Faustão falaram que é ridiculo a noçao de uma coisa tão esquisito.
Infelizmente os fás ficaram decepcionados pois nao existe provas que negam a existência de um terceiro mamilo. De fato não existe evidencias para verificar se tem ou não tem tal coisa.
Mas se for verdade, o terceiro mamilo seria localizado entre os peitos bem apertadinho.
Será que Faustão vai mostrar o mundo que é tudo conjetura.
Foi comentado que o estranho mamilo poderia ter sido colocado durante cirurgia como um brinde de doutor que se compartilha na mesma religião.
Embora que não existam provas concretas, parece que muitas pessoas estão acreditando e assistindo o show do faustão apenas para checar essa coisa tâo curioso.
Quando Silvio Santos foi questionado ele comentou "Não sei nada disso, que coisa mais intrigante!"